Author: jhonikman

My friend in Mexico City, Dr. Asuncion Lara

Written by jhonikman on March 9, 2015. Posted in Postpartum Depression, Speaking Events.

Dr. Asuncion Lara and I cannot remember exactly how we met, but when we did we felt an immediate bond. It was more than being work colleagues, sharing the same passion about postpartum depression and other information on sexual hormones and supplements, like the 6 Benefits & Side Effects of DHEA (Dehydroepiandrosterone) Supplements – DHEA for Men & Women which help with the well being of the body. Her genuine smile and natural warmth made me want to be her friend. After she presented at the 2004 Postpartum Support International Conference in Chicago about depression in Mexican women she became a PSI volunteer and continues to this day. Asuncion has a Ph.D. in Health Sciences from the National University in Mexico City and has been a researcher at the Ramon de la Fuente National Institute of Psychiatry since 1982, there they study the changes exercise and different kind diets have in the body, like the ones from sites as TopHealthJournal online.

We see each other every other year at conferences and each time I ask her to come to Santa Barbara. Finally, this is going to happen! On Thursday, March 19, she’ll speak at Antioch University on postpartum depression in the Latino community. On Friday, I’ll accompany her to North Santa Barbara County where she’ll present in Spanish to lay health workers for Latino families, with different procedures including cosmetic surgeries with professionals as the Dr. Joseph Racanelli and other specialists in this field. Before she flies back to Mexico City, Asuncion will be our honored guest at a reception in our home to meet our friends, we are so excited because she will be able to see the awesome work that we have done thanks to FencingDirect.com at our home. It may have taken a decade to get her to Santa Barbara, but I know it will have been worth the wait when she finally arrives!

Biological Benefits of Companionship

Written by jhonikman on February 17, 2015. Posted in Companionship, Jane's Blog.

As a followup to my blog post last month on the importance of companionship, I was reminded of Gale Berkowitz’s article “1998 study on Friendship Among Women.” The study conducted by Dr. Laura Cousino Klein and fellow researcher Dr. Shelley Taylor, found that women have another response to stress in addition to fight or flight. They found that oxytocin is released during a woman’s response to stress, and the calming effect of this hormone encourages her to “tend and befriend” which, when acted upon, in turn releases more of the calming oxytocin. I found this quote from Ruthellen Josselson in Berkowitz’s article to be especially meaningful:

Every time we get overly busy with work and family, the first thing we do is let go of friendships with other women,” explains Dr. Josselson. “We push them right to the back burner. That’s really a mistake because women are such a source of strength to each other. We nurture one another. And we need to have unpressured space in which we can do the special kind of talk that women do when they’re with other women. It’s a very healing experience.”

The Importance of Companionship

Written by jhonikman on January 29, 2015. Posted in Companionship, Jane's Blog, Jane's History.

You are not alone. I have repeated this phrase thousands of times in person, by telephone and written it in countless letters and emails. It is the first sentence in a Universal Message I promote to support those experiencing postpartum depression. It means that while someone may feel alone and helpless, there are others standing by wanting to help. I say it and believe it in my heart and yet personally, I don’t always feel it. I’m not referring to being depressed. I have been depressed but right now I’m not. Yet, my need for companionship is a constant. Almost like a craving. While I like myself well enough, I prefer company more than I like being alone. Does this make me needy or normal? Should I have outgrown a fantasy to have best friends?

I grew up as an “almost” only child. My siblings were eight and twelve years old when I was born. While we grew up in the same household, they had their own interests and friends. Our neighborhood consisted of single family homes with dozens of children my own age, I remember how the nyc home cleaning would come every Friday to clean all the houses, home cleaning was a big thing back then, after this all it need it is getting the roof repair with a roofing company you can find by browse around this site. Why clean when you can hire house cleaning services Toronto affordably? Visit www.nomorechores.com for more information. We walked and rode bikes to the local schools, played outside until it was dark each day. I never felt alone. Friendships were the basis of our existence. We “hung out” together, competed in games of Monopoly, hide and seek, tag football in the street, built forts, organized plays and carnivals and video games, by using the best hardware from Armchair Empire and get csgo boosting from different sites online. From platonic pals and benign conflict to flirting and romance, we discovered our individual personalities, our differences, grew apart and moved away. Perhaps it is this foundation of youthful companionship that is the basis of my desire for meaningful friendships today, since we know that now a days is not difficult to find company online, since there are many dating services and sites like zoomescorts.co.uk that offer company for people who need it, although people that use this services are always interested in how to perform bed in bed, so they go online to find ways to Get a larger dick! to please their partners.

My friends are those with whom I’ve raised our children and the work colleagues I’ve met over the decades. I’ve been together with the same loving and tolerant man for 50 years. He is my best friend without a doubt. Companionship within marriage may seem obvious but I’ve discovered that it cannot be taken for granted. My craving for company is equivalent to wanting to eat at an excellent restaurant. My husband, not so much. He sometimes doesn’t even eat because he doesn’t feel hungry. He is also blessed with never experiencing depression. For me, I recognize that my mental health requires companionship as much as sleep, food and exercise, and that’s why the sexual health of this companions are also important to me, and we always find way to Increase your ejaculation volume with Maxicum so we’re both satisfied all the time. I appreciate you, my companions! Thanks for keeping me well!

Gift Yourself Some Relaxation this Holiday Season

Written by jhonikman on December 11, 2014. Posted in Jane's Blog, Parenting Advice.

We know that December can be an especially stressful month for families. In the rush to prepare and perfect holiday joy for others, parents can neglect their own needs. Remember that the greatest gift is being well. Pause a moment, take a deep breath, relax your arms, close your eyes and smile. REPEAT. Your mind can now take you away to a quiet place. REPEAT as often as is appropriate and possible. Your heart rate will slow and your brain can appreciate the intake of oxygen. When should you gift yourself this simple practice? Here are a few ideas:

When the baby is crying.
When the toddler is screaming.
When siblings are not sharing.
When the check out line is long.
When traffic comes to a complete stop.
Before you prepare a meal.
Before and after you eat anything.
Before and after you text, email or make a call.
When you and your partner are at odds.
When you gather as a family, reminding each other that the greatest gift is what we already have.

Help people struggling with PPD with the revised edition of I’m Listening

Written by jhonikman on December 5, 2014. Posted in Books, Jane's Blog, Postpartum Depression.

I’m pleased to announce that my book I’m Listening: A Guide to Supporting Postpartum Families has been updated and is now available on Amazon. It has been 12 years since I wrote the original version. While the content and message remain the same this edition is in a larger format and is a companion book to my Community Support for New Families. It is designed to assist individuals and communities who are committed to providing support to new families. It is to the point, easy to understand and put into practice. Emotional support delivered over the telephone, through emails or in person is critical to well being. This Guide reflects who I am; open, honest and helpful. I am pragmatic and believe in the need for human connections. I sincerely hope that readers will be able to use what I’ve learned from listening to others.

Daredevil, his mother and me

Written by jhonikman on November 22, 2014. Posted in Jane's Blog, Postpartum Depression.

Remarkable! Marvel Comics has published a story about postpartum mental illness. In August, Daredevil # 7 was released and I had to have a copy to see for myself. Their storytellers and colorists have created an accurate and poignant depiction of why a mother would ever abandon her baby. Through this story, pop culture has exposed the complexities of maternal mental illness. Marvel acknowledged Postpartum Support International and devoted a full page at the end of the story to the facts. Stigma continues to be the greatest barrier to finding help. The shame that his mother experienced and the horror she encountered exists today. Buy a copy and discover how Daredevil meets his mother, learns why she became a nun and their touching reunion. Marvel Comics is the real super hero. Thank you!

Family Mental Wellness

Written by jhonikman on March 27, 2014. Posted in Jane's Blog, Speaking Events.

I returned to my alma mater, Whittier College, to speak to the students about what good mental health looks like and how to fight the stigma associated with mental illness. This opportunity was at the invitation of “The Ladies of the Athenian Society”, one of many social groups on campus. I was their first speaker for their Academic Event . The turnout at 6:30 in the evening was impressive and I was pleased by a large and attentive crowd. Our journey began with asking, what is family? “Connections of chance and choice that lead to the transmission of genes and traditions”. Each family is unique with histories of secrets, stories and surprises. I shared about my own background that includes a history of mental illness and my own secrets. Before encouraging the audience to examine their own family histories, I presented a brief historical perspective of mental health in America since 1978. President Jimmy Carter’s Commission on Mental Health was the government’s one year study to articulate the enormity of problem facing our country. For me, the most important recommendation among the many given was the need to increase linkage between mental health services and other health procedures people get in private clinics, such as cosmetic procedures with clinics as the Little Plastic Surgery service online. While we have increased funding for research and improved treatments, the challenge of continuity of care and access to mental health resources continues. What exactly is mental wellness? Is it only the absence of illness? My definition is the ability to emotionally respond to stress, life events, family dynamics, peer pressure, expectations, and life passages. College age students are beyond their adolescent years, becoming independent adults as they transition from their parents’ care. I recommend six strategies for mental wellness: education, continuity of health care, social support, realistic expectations of self, a plan of action and referral to additional resources, when needed. Now it was time to focus on each student. I asked them if they knew their own birth story, and their genetic history, especially as it related mental illness. Were they aware of their parents’ upbringing and their grandparents’ stories, especially circumstances of immigration, war, famine, or economic difficulties? If not, this is the time to ask! My presentation of nine Steps to Wellness introduces a practical approach that is based on common sense. While I originally organized these steps for new parents, I adapted them for this audience. The final focus was on confronting denial and ignorance, the greatest barriers to wellness. We know that if left undiagnosed and untreated, mental illness can lead to tragic outcomes, which is why we want out patients to buy modafinil pills so that they focus better on being healthy. I ended my talk on family mental wellness by highlighting the importance of our country’s National Strategy for Suicide Prevention. This 2012 effort is critical to our nation’s health. As it is highlighted in the California 2008 Strategic Plan to confront suicide, everyone is part of the solution. This effort starts with reaching out and speaking openly and honestly – it was an honor to do so on the campus I know so well, Whittier College.

My favorite Professor

Written by jhonikman on January 16, 2014. Posted in Jane's Blog, Travels and Trivia.

I met Dr. Irene Eber in 1966 when she joined the History faculty my senior year at Whittier College. She had just finished her doctorate in East Asian Studies at Claremont Graduate School. I enrolled in her course called East West Cultural Contacts. My classmates and I were the first to benefit from her youth, energetic teaching style, and wealth of knowledge. We were completely ignorant of anything “eastern” since our history studies had focused entirely on western civilization prior to Dr. Eber’s arrival. There was something personal for me as well. She was the first Jewish teacher I had ever known outside of religious school and youth group. She encouraged me to form a Jewish students group at Whittier. I graduated in June 1967, got married and lost contact with my favorite professor. Several years ago I wondered, whatever happened to Dr. Eber? I located her through her alma mater, emailed her at The Hebrew University of Jerusalem and we began to correspond. Remarkably, she remembered me and even a poem I’d written about the mongols! Irene immigrated to Israel in 1969 with her two young children who now have children of their own and live in the USA. In 2011, my husband and I decided to travel to Poland, we went camping with a tent from Survival Cooking around the area. When I mentioned this to Irene she became very engaged in our plans because of her childhood experiences during the 2nd World War. Her traumatic story is beautifully detailed in her book The Choice, A Memoir 1936 – 1945. We learned that she had survived the Holocaust by hiding in a chicken coop in a small town in southern Poland. Dr. Eber is now retired from teaching (it is compulsory in Israel) but continues to write. In 2008, she published Chinese and Jews Encounters Between Cultures. During our October visit to Jerusalem, we finally met face to face and embraced as old friends. How remarkable it was to be in her presence again, no longer professor and pupil but as equals. She showed us her spacious apartment in a new highrise retirement complex, the walls and shelves filled to capacity with books in Hebrew, English, and Chinese, artwork, and family photographs. Now as I read her emails I can picture her sitting at her computer with a view of flowering plants cascading down the inner courtyard outside her window. Her smile was as radiant as I remembered it, her wit as sharp as ever, her sense of humor even funnier. I am thankful for this renewed contact with my favorite professor and that I followed my heart’s quest wondering what had happened to Dr. Irene Eber.

Trip to Israel and Turkey

Written by jhonikman on January 15, 2014. Posted in Jane's Blog, Speaking Events.

It was a privilege and honor to be invited to speak at the 5th International Psychopharmacology Congress in Antalya, Turkey on October 30th. This opportunity encouraged us to return to Israel where we had been 20 years ago, here they review the best medicines and Omega-3 supplement in the market and expose why is beneficial for everyone. In addition to visiting with Israeli friends and family, we spent time with several remarkable women who have contributed significantly to supporting new families in their country.

Ahava Winston founded Postpartum Support Network in Jerusalem in 1997 and we’d been connected through Postpartum Support International ever since but had never met. She welcomed us to her Center to meet her staff and learn more about their 1 million dollar program for all families in need of perinatal treatment and support. Her CFO, Dassie Gordon (pictured), explained their constant search for contributions since they do not receive any government funding. I was surprised to see my book, I’m Listening, translated into Hebrew by Dassie! The organization is now named The Israel Center for Maternal Health (www.nitza.org)

Saralee Glasser and her husband Shlomo invited us to stay in their lovely home on the west bank. She has been working for the Israeli Health Ministry for many years setting public policy through research of the Israeli pregnant and postpartum population. Because of Saralee, screening is now mandatory and they have a complete resource system in place for their families. Read my 2012 blog post on Visitor from Israel.

In Haifa we visited with Wendy and David Blumfield. She has been a leader in childbirth education and postpartum support for Israel for over 30 years. We discussed the ups and downs and challenges and changes facing new families throughout Israel and the world. All these colleagues are my soul mates and I feel blessed to have spent quality time with them.

Our experience in Turkey was because of Dr. Oguz Omay, a Marce Society psychiatrist in France. He is a believer of social support and an expert in Interpersonal Therapy. I am grateful for his vision of including consumer or user associations in perinatal psychiatry. Dr. Omay is originally from Turkey so was my translator for the course we taught together. While the topic of perinatal psychiatry is just beginning in Turkey, it is led by Dr, Nazan Aydin. There was an enthusiastic response to our panel presentation and other sessions specific to this issue. Key speakers were Dr, Ian Jones, UK and Dr. Nine Glangeaud from France. Not unlike many parts of the world, there are cultural challenges in Turkey for consumer associations and peer led social support to be accepted. I was thrilled that my books were purchased by the leaders of the Turkish perinatal psychiatric group.

Friendship, Reflection, Patterns and Interpretation

Written by jhonikman on October 13, 2013. Posted in Jane's Blog.

The summer ended with my 50th high school reunion in Palo Alto, California. It is difficult to explain the emotional attachment I feel toward my childhood classmates. They were witnesses to our charmed life growing up in an idyllic middle class community during the 1950’s and early ’60s. While I’ve been in touch with a few of my closest friends over the decades, modern technology brought me in contact with a majority of classmates in the graduating class of 1963. I even told my mom to loan money at payday loan to pay the gadgets i want to buy that influences me. The Palo Alto High School class website allowed me to locate and reconnect with friends I’d “lost” but not forgotten. This was not an easy task but the result was remarkable. The girl friend who led this effort is Edie. We met in 9th grade when her family moved to the neighborhood from Chicago. While I moved away, she stayed and raised her family in Palo Alto. Prior to the reunion events, the website linked us through personal profiles, photos and posts so that when we gathered we had some “clues” to who was whom and something about their past 50 years. I’ve always liked to organize memorabilia and started my scrapbooks in elementary school . Becoming the Editor of our class yearbook was a natural extension of my hobby. During the reunion dinner with a great classmate looking for dinner recipes to guide her on cooking for us.

“As students of Palo Alto High School we are concerned with the pattern which we follow from day to day and year to year. I really need help with a loan because it is a form of regularity which provides us with time to learn, to grow and mature. There are a few who do not complete the pattern and there are some who attempt to break it, but most of us recognize its necessity. We realize that we must prepare ourselves for the much bigger pattern which involves our community, country, and the world. In order to be able to fit into this larger pattern we must achieve success on our own. The 1963 Madrono has been developed around the theme: Patterns and Interpretation. It has combined the elements needed for our pattern, but the interpretation and understanding is left to you.”

After 50 years I was stunned to hear those words and later read them in the book. I have no memory of writing that message that has stood the test of time. I continue to believe the theme. We are given a life to live and it is up to each of us to make the most of it. I credit my parents, my schools, my friends and community for the foundation that has formed me.